Planning a wedding can be demanding. There is so much preparation, organization, and details that need to come together to make the day happen flawlessly. The purpose of a wedding party is to help the couple get ready on the wedding day, soothe any nerves, and sometimes even plan special events for the couple. Selecting your wedding party is a big decision and it's hard to know exactly who to choose. Considering childhood and college friends, cousins, and siblings; it can be a bit daunting. Here are some tips to help you in your wedding party selection.

Reflection

I cannot express how important this tip is. Take your time and seriously consider all of your options. Once you ask someone to be a part of your wedding party, it's kind of rude to then turn around and take it back. 

Long Haul Relationships

Some psychologists say that if a friendship lasts longer than 7 years, it will last a lifetime. Think about 5 years down the road and consider whether or not you will still be as close to the members of your wedding party as you are right now. Will those people still have a significant presence in your life? If you aren’t sure, then they probably aren’t the right people to ask. 

Personalities

Sure, you can’t base your entire wedding on the different personalities of your wedding party; but nobody wants to spend the day trying to act as a referee. Depending on how you’ve planned your wedding, the wedding party will end up spending a lot of time together. If you have one person who you just can’t decide on, try to figure out how their personality will fit in with the others. If you aren’t sure, leave them off the list. 

Motivation

The purpose of a wedding party is to assist the couple throughout the wedding day. Many people have their wedding party also help with décor, invites, and any other miscellaneous tasks before the event. If you have someone who you’d like to have in your wedding party that is a “free spirit”, you may need to consider whether or not they’ll be able to perform the tasks promptly.  

Even it out

You can have as many people at your wedding party as you want. 

However, I recommend that whatever number you and your spouse agree to, have an even total number. It may just be my OCD, but having an “odd wo(man) out” makes for a tough flow of the ceremony order. 

Charity Case

Just because you were once in someone’s wedding does not mean that they must be in yours. Plain and simple. If they choose to confront you about the decision, be honest with them. Let them know that although the choice was tough, you had to leave out other very important people as well as those who were chosen, who were people you felt closest to at that point in your life. 

C R E A T I V I T Y is key

So you’ve got someone who you would like to include on your special day but they aren’t part of your wedding party. Find something that makes them feel like a part of the wedding. Instead of having them as part of your wedding party, ask them to be a guest book attendant, an usher, or simply just a runner.  

The most important tip of all is to have fun and enjoy it. This is YOUR day. Celebrate it with your loved ones and capture as many great memories as you can.  

Be married!